I realize that I am a day late for the feast day of Ignatius Loyola, still, let me share a few perspectives of Ignatian spirituality that have been helpful to me in my recovery from the addictions of others and in my addictions from my own harmful ways of being. I hope that you will […]
I remember thinking that when my loved one stopped drinking, that our problems would be over… I’ve since learned how naive this kind of thinking is. If you are new to recovery, you need to know that drugs and alcohol are not the problem. They are a symptom. And while the symptom causes additional problems, […]
When I was growing up I had a very controlling great aunt who had no children. She was my grandmother’s youngest sister. Because she was unable to have children, she picked favorite nieces and nephews to dote on. If you were one of her ‘favorites’ this devotion came with strings attached. I remember my grandmother […]
“I trust in God,” I used to say without much thought. Or, “At least I have my faith.” But what do those things mean? Do I really mean it? What do they mean to you? Have you ever thought about faith? What is the difference between faith and trust? I’m doing the spiritual exercises in […]
My dad used to get angry if he thought that one of us kids was being lazy. His anger was over the top. Over the last 13 years I started to understand that as the child of an alcoholic, he had conflated laziness with alcoholism. Since his father’s disease kept him from working, my dad […]
As I was leaving my annual physical, the doctor stopped me in the hallway, “Hey, your labs came back from your last appointment. You’re normal on all tests.” “Oh that’s good.” Then, I laughed, “Actually that’s a first. I don’t think anyone has ever called me normal before. “My doctor chuckled and said, “Let […]
The most powerful lessons that I’ve been taught occurred when I stopped trying. Out of frustration, I throw my hands in the air and say, “Okay Lord, I don’t know what to do. I give up.” Then whatever situation or thing that I was trying to change stopped ruling my life. Getting to the place […]
I’ve been trying to consider the best tips that have helped me in my recovery journey. This nugget was the one that changed me the most. That is why I’m offering it right before your family gathers in for the Thanksgiving holiday. At my first 12-step meeting, I was surprised to learn that I was […]
I dream of walking the Camino de Santiago de Compostela one day. The Camino de Santiago (the Way of St. James) is a large network of ancient pilgrim routes stretching across Europe and coming together at the tomb of St. James (Santiago in Spanish) in Santiago de Compostela in north-west Spain. Movies like Wild and The Way […]
If you show up at a 12-step meeting for friends and family members, it won’t take long before someone tells you to mind your own business. “You need to get out of God’s way” is usually the next piece of advice. Out in the world when we tell someone to mind their own business it […]