Out of boredom, I decided to watch the first episode of the show “Ted Lasso” found on the streaming service, Apple TV. It was odd. It took most of the episode to wrap my mind around it. Curious, I watched the second and then the third. Then I stopped. It was so good that I wanted to start over and watch it with my husband.
There are very few shows that we like in common. So, my husband was skeptical when I told him that he would love Ted Lasso as much as I did. As I watched these first few episodes a second time, I also watched my husband closely to gauge his reaction. What was it about this show that made me feel so good? Would he feel the same way?
I did prepare him for the language. I’m not usually easily offended, but ‘F-bombs’ were thrown around like confetti at a party in this show and could be off-putting for some. It is not appropriate for children, but I ask you to bear with it.
As the first episode ended, I looked at him and asked, “Do you love Ted Lasso?” He smiled and said, “You know I don’t really like television anymore but that is a good show.” So, we watched another episode and at the end, I asked that same question and he smiled again and said, “Ted Lasso is such a good guy.” As we went through the first season, at the conclusion of each episode, we’d look at each other and say at almost the same time, “I love Ted Lasso.”
That feeling that we were left with at the end of the episodes is something that St. Ignatius might call consolation. It is a feeling that is brought on by an increase in faith, hope and love. Once I named this feeling, I started to notice what Ted Lasso had in common with Ignatian spirituality. Let me give you some examples:
Ted Lasso has a ‘Believe’ sign hung crookedly above his office door. Central to his coaching method is the pedagogy of learning to believe in the idea of believing—as a 12-stepper who sits around a circle each week allowing others the space to start believing in a god of their own understanding, I think that Ted Lasso is offering his players and the audience what 12-steppers have pointed out for decades, “It doesn’t matter who the god of your understanding is as long as it’s not you.”
Ted plants this seed for his players. There is something bigger than themselves even if they can’t yet name it. This helps raise the awareness of our place in this whole arrangement that we have with God. Ignatius points this out in the principle and foundation of the spiritual exercises. He is God and we are not. We are made to praise, serve and reverence him.
Ted is a quirky character. In the beginning everyone underestimates him. That doesn’t seem to deter him. He says what he thinks and not what he thinks you want to hear. No matter what names he is called or what the headlines say about him, he is grounded in who he is. In his humility, we witness the personal freedom that Ignatius talks about in the meditation of the two standards.
From that humility, Ted’s influence begins to spread. We observe the players begin to find their own worth through Ted’s belief in them. Their characters begin to develop. Yet their humanity still shows. Ted helps them see each other beyond their vices. He creates the idea of family within the team.
Ted is also known for telling his players, “Be curious, not judgmental.” He knows that when his players make a mistake that they are often the hardest on themselves. He reminds them of this directive every time he says, “Be a goldfish.” He tells his players that goldfish only have a ten second memory. Learn what you did wrong and then let go of those shortcomings. Don’t allow them to define you.
Ignatius said something similar, realizing our tendency to be too harsh on ourselves when we make mistakes. He knew that we had to observe ourselves with the eyes of Jesus to be able to learn about ourselves when he said, “When taking the first steps on the road of virtue, the old man must be mortified, but in such a way as not to slay the new man.” Ted Lasso is teaching his players personal mercy.
This is evidenced when we watch two rival players, Roy Kent and Jamie Tart be able to hear one another for the first time when Roy and Jamie disagree over how a play should be executed. Roy thinks that Jamie should defend his teammate while Jamie calmly disagrees making a case for trusting his teammate and giving him the space, he needs to handle the situation himself.
You can see Roy seeing his point and at the same time making a connection between this situation on the pitch and one at home where he isn’t giving his girlfriend, Keely enough personal space. He shouts another expletive and storms off the field to correct the situation at home. I think that if Ignatius were here watching this scene with us, he would stand and applaud Roy Kent for finding God right there on the pitch (remember he was our only saint with a police record). Even Ted Lasso teaches us that we can find God in all things.
This show wins hearts with Ted’s quirky demeanor and no-quitting attitude for sure. Does it teach us about Ignatian spirituality or am I just finding God in all things? I don’t know. But I do know this: I love Ted Lasso and I think you will too.
Let’s remember that ‘we can find contentment and happiness whether the alcoholic is still drinking or not…’ I urge you to look for ways to find joy right where you are.
As always, I offer this work as a prayer for you and your loved ones.