When Storms Come

A week before Christmas, I stood before a group of people at Ignatius House in Atlanta, Georgia. Each person there shared the common problem of living with an addiction in a loved one. They were looking for help. They needed hope.

I had my entire presentation carefully planned out, but when I got up to introduce myself, I felt called to add something that was weighing on my heart: “If you’d asked me about my hometown a month ago, I would’ve said that I am from a small town in western Kentucky.

Today, I’ll tell you that I am from Princeton Kentucky and that my husband is from Dawson Springs Kentucky. I imagine that you’ve now heard of both of these small towns. You may have seen them on national news segments where the president toured the damage caused by the December 10th tornadoes.

As soon as I mentioned the name of each town, there was a collective, audible gasp that made its way around the room. I imagine that when you look at the picture in this header, a similar guttural reaction occurs in you. A school bus still delivers children to what is left of homes in amongst this rubble. Though this story has faded from many national news headlines, families still face this devastation day-in and day-out.

Though my retreat participant’s storm is of the emotional variety, they could relate. Whether there is a troubling diagnosis, a natural disaster, the loss of a loved one or a family addiction the trauma of any situation must be faced if healing is to occur.

I continued with what I felt called to say. “The storm left little standing where it hit in Kentucky. But the storm has passed. If you are sitting here today, you probably feel as if a storm has hit your family. You are experiencing the wreckage that addiction leaves behind.

The event, whether it is a storm or a loved one’s struggle with addiction has occurred. It is awful and devastating but that part is behind you. According to Gabor Mate, MD, ” Trauma is not what happens to you; trauma is what happens inside of you as a result of what happens to you.”

Once the storm has passed, there is sadness and grief. You may feel overwhelmed and not know the next right step to take. It may seem impossible to take care of yourself, let alone other family members.

I am here to offer you hope. I’m here to share my experience. The clutter can be cleared away and rebuilding is possible. It won’t be easy but difficult doesn’t mean impossible. You’ve taken the first step by coming to this retreat. Your attendance is an acceptance that you can’t do this alone. You need help.

Finding the courage to come out of isolation and ask for help is so important. You will need to trust God in a way that you never have before. And you will need to lean on others. This is how you will heal and how you can offer healing to others.”

I think the same is true for the towns that raised both my husband and I. They will need others and they will need God. Sure they need a lot of physical assistance. That is obvious and support services are on the ground. Stories of neighbor helping neighbor have been heartwarming.

It seems that the grace that came out of this storm is that we remembered that we belong to each other. We are each a child of God, made in his image and likeness. It is indeed a gift and a privilege to be our brother’s keeper. We learn these same lessons in recovery programs.

As I’ve shared this story with others where I live and in places where I’ve spoken, they always ask, “How can I help?” I didn’t always know which direction to point them in. And when you don’t know what to do, you stop and pray…

I’ve reached out to high school and college friends. They have introduced me to well-connected members of the community. It has been such a blessing to begin working with such compassionate people.

Plans are being worked out to offer ‘Unity in the Chaos’–A Community Ecumenical Lenten Series. Central Presbyterian Church, First Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) Ogden Memorial United Methodist Church and St. Paul Catholic Church are sponsoring this event.

Joining me for these evening reflections will be fellow Caldwell Co. High School graduates: Elizabeth Cook McKeehan, a licensed mental health counselor from Orlando FL and Rev Lee Young, Pastor of First Christian Church, Republic MO. Rev. Donna Webster, transitional pastor at Central Presbyterian Church, Princeton KY and Dr. Jonathan Webster, board certified chaplain and pastor at First Christian Church, Princeton KY will round out the program.

This will be in-person and live-streamed from First Christian Church in Princeton Kentucky (available on this website) on Thursdays at 6:30 pm March 3, March 10, March 17, March 24, March 31 and April 7, 2022. There will be a place where, if you feel called you can donate. This direct link will go towards mental, emotional and spiritual counseling for those who have been traumatized by this disaster.

This piece would not be what it is without the powerful photographs taken by Jason Jones of Jones Photography.

For more information on this event: [email protected] or 270-398-5600